How do you know when you're persevering… and when you're simply being stubborn?

Jul 15
2 min read

On the surface the two can look identical. Both involve conviction, resistance, and continuing forward despite obstacles. But spiritually — and practically — they come from very different places.

Stubbornness is driven by ego. Perseverance is driven by purpose.

Stubbornness clings to being right; perseverance clings to seeking what’s true.

Stubbornness resists new information; perseverance learns from it.

Scripture offers a powerful example of this distinction.

You see this contrast vividly in the Gospel about the man born blind. The healed man is open, curious, receptive — he sees more clearly as truth unfolds. The Pharisees, on the other hand, have all the evidence in front of them, yet remain unmoved. Why? Not because the facts aren’t compelling, but because they refuse to let the evidence change them. Their self-assured righteousness blinds them to what is obvious to everyone else.

Every leader faces this temptation.

When our ego is hooked — our reputation, our image, our need to avoid being wrong — we stop evaluating reality and start defending ourselves. We become committed not to the outcome, but to our version of the outcome. And the more evidence accumulates, the more dug‑in we become.

But perseverance looks different. It is humble, data‑responsive, and mission‑driven. It adapts, revises, and recalibrates. It stays anchored to the goal, not the original plan. True perseverance is willing to learn, because it cares more about achieving the right result than proving the original idea was right. In leadership, the question is this: Are you pushing forward because the mission requires it — or because your ego does? Every difficult decision presents the same choice:

Will your ego lead…

Or will your mission?

One opens your eyes.

The other slowly makes you blind.

Fr. Mark Haydu LC.

The current chaplain to the Lumen Institute, NYC, is an experienced Spiritual Director with a demonstrated history of working with and in teams from Vatican City to New York City. Skilled in retreats, mentoring, fundraising, writing, public speaking, moral theology, and spiritual counseling. He is a strong community and social services professional with a master’s degree in both Philosophical Ethics and Moral Theology, with a focus on Family and Sexual Ethics.